Our strong willed child

Noah has been wearing Josh and I out for the last couple of weeks, literally! He has never been the easiest baby, but this is new. He fights us, screams, and has been known to hit on occasion. I at first thought that he was defiant, but after giving it more thought I decided that he's strong willed. He doesn't have tantrums to upset us, but he doesn't hesitate to have a fit if we won't let him do something that he wants to do. For example I have been showing Noah how to sit in his chair the right way, but every time he tips it over and sits in it how he wants to...its driving me crazy! Noah's behavior has become my obsession in the past couple of weeks. I know that Josh, my Mom, my friend Amy (and everyone else I know!) has heard all about my "problem" and my new ideas for handling it (which change daily.)
I recently bought the book, "Love and Logic for Early Childhood." I love it! My Aunt Jane discovered it and told me that I needed to get it. She is reading the one for teenagers as my cousin Ally is 17. I asked Ally how it was working and she thought it was going pretty well! I have read so many parenting books and I feel like I finally found one that makes sense. It is so easy to implement and it trains kids to be independent decision makers. Schools more or less use this approach now, not always with the same name, but the same idea. The problem with this book and all of the others is that it does very little to address how to deal with behavior from someone as young as Noah. Love and Logic had the most info, but there still isn't a lot. When he starts to have a fit or throws things, etc. we pick him up and say, "that's so sad." We then hold him until the tantrum stops or we take away what he was throwing. He is such a fighter, but I think that he is starting to understand.
I am going to substitute teach, mostly for Josh, until the baby is born. He received a state grant to help him with his administrative internship that pays for him to have a sub. This will be just a couple of times a week. Noah went to a lady named Tanya last year who lives two minutes from the school and watches two of the other teachers kids. She loved him and he loved her and it was a great situation for everyone as she only had two other kids. He had his first day there last week and when I picked him up she informed me that he had been hitting a little girl that is exactly his age. The first thing I asked about was his nap schedule. He is really a two nap kind of kid. When he doesn't get them his behavior is not good (not that its ever good right now, but worse!) Getting two naps at Tanya's is not possible with her school pick up schedule. He just can't handle that environment right now. We called our baby-sitter Kaitlyn to see if she could watch him at our house and we were so happy to hear that she could. She is the best and Noah just loves her, so hopefully he will be on his best behavior so she doesn't quit!
I started worrying that we were sheltering Noah too much and that maybe he just needed to deal with it. The more I thought about it, the more I started to feel that we needed to set him up to be successful, especially because he is having such a hard time. Not getting enough naps and being out of his home environment all day is not setting him up to succeed right now.
We found a great pre-school and Noah had his first day last week. I am hoping that he will learn the necessary skills to play nicely there and to also learn that he doesn't always get to do what he wants, when he wants to do it. It's a co-op so I go with him and so I was able to see first hand what we were dealing with. He played very nicely with the other kids, but didn't like transitioning. When is was circle time and he still wanted to play with toys he started screaming and fighting me, I held on tight until he stopped. He then loved circle time and didn't want to go to a shaving cream station. This went on and on for each transition, but by the end the tantrums were much shorter. I hope he was realizing that they weren't getting him any where and that he wasn't going to win the battle.
You hear about these families where the kids are all so passive, we have some friends with kids like these. From the very beginning they sleep, eat, and behave well...and then there's Noah! He is the greatest baby ever, always giving kisses, and ready to play, but he is so strong willed. I know that this will be beneficial later in life as we hope he is as stubborn about making good life choices. But, for now, we are very tired and praying that this phase will go as quickly as it came on! I can't wait until he is older and can understand what the consequences are for his actions, I am also excited for things like time outs!